Sometimes You Should be Late
The quiet rebellion of slowing down in a world obsessed with speed
Coming July 7, 2026!
This is a book about choosing how we move through time.
In April 2025 I wrote a Psychology Today article sparked a wave of resonance (“If I hadn’t let myself feel rushed, I would have been a far better parent.”) and plenty of pushback (“Aren’t you just justifying flakiness?!”). Since then, dozens of conversations have convinced me that slowing down is central we can create the kinder, more caring, and less lonely world we all crave.
Sometimes You Should Be Late is for anyone who’s done with pretending that speed equals virtue and feeling ashamed when life (and traffic) doesn’t fit neatly into a schedule. This book rejects absolutes: it won’t justify flakiness but it also won’t validate those that say “if you’re not early, you’re late.” Instead it’s about becoming more aware of the inherited stories about time and choosing, together, to align our behavior with our values, not the clock.
This book will...
Help you feel seen.
It’s easy to feel alone and lonely when the world is moving fast
You’ll discover language for the pressures you’ve carried for years: the panic when running late, the pull to be everything for everyone, the constant hum of urgency beneath daily school/work/family.
You’ll feel validated both for your reliability and your longing to move through the world with more care, spaciousness, and sanity.
You’ll realize you’re not the only one quietly wanting to rebel against the pace of modern life.
Give you practical tools for busy lives.
Slowing down is really hard, especially when pressures of work, school, and family and life rear their heads.
Reflection prompts that help you notice your own patterns — not mine, not society’s — but yours.
Authentic communication tools you try out right away: simpler apologies, less blaming traffic, fewer shame spirals.
Four practical chapters to help you honor buffers, slow down when you’re late, communicate authentically, and waiting without, well, waiting.
Empower you to influence the cultures you’re part of.
It’s easy to feel like we are victims of broader cultures, but we slow rebels co-create them, too.
Concrete ways to question default ways of moving through time and set healthier expectations.
A four-part Annex features with real-life experiments for family, friendships, work, and school, the places where the pressures of time come out—but also where change is possible
Intrigued? Pre-order it here!
Lets Slow Down…With Haste!
My book arrives in Summer 2026 but please don’t wait to slow down. Start now: care for yourself, linger with those around you, and remember that sometimes being late isn’t just okay… it may be the kinder choice! Here are three tips from my article:
1. Build a Kindness Buffer. Plan to arrive five minutes early, or take something off your to-do list, to create room for presence. This is your kindness buffer: a margin that gives you the space to say hello to the barista, ask a real follow-up question or take a breath before a meeting. We always say we’d be kind if we had the time. The kindness buffer is how you make the time.
2. Slow Down When You’re Already Late. You’re late. The meeting started. There’s no time machine. What should you do? Slow down.
Bear with me: The instinct is to speed up to atone for our sins but that almost always makes things worse. You spill your coffee, snap at someone, risk an accident or ticket as you speed through traffic. You can’t choose to be on time, but you can still choose to be kind.
3. Own Your Lateness With Heart. Sometimes you’re late because something else mattered more. That’s not failure; it’s presence. Sure, apologize for the disruption. But don’t erase the care that made you late, even if it’s self-care. If someone’s upset that you took a minute to be human, that might say more about them than you.